today...02/07/2008...staying in camp for f**king 7 days...well...dun wish to say it out...just damn sway...everything to me now like breaks down...my life...my relationship...so long nv really touch my blog...nv tel others abt it..kept it to myself..sometimes hope someone/ somebody reads or dun read my blog...either one..
relationship - really have been suffering and miserable for 5 months...Janet ( my gf ), really doesnt understands me at all....all she cares was only having fun with her so-called "new found trusted colleagues or friends"....does she really care abt me...nowadays every night...almost...she said she got outing...pubbing...clubbing with her friends...nv even bother to call while she's having her fun...i've been into such miserable life when i needed someone...but she didnt..i wanted someone there before bedtime and have a good night chat...but...i just dun got to get it...is it very hard for someone to be there for me...when i'm really down....when i'm down...she's out there having here fun...its suffering you know that...very "gek xim and cheng xim"...haiz...feel like an empty shell soul-less...dunno where i'm going....like being blown by the wind in all different directions...lost...this is how i feel...
Hope someone out there really help me...hope my tua li ah peh will know how i feel...ah pehs' they all...whenever they possess my bro as he's a medium ( ki tong )...they'll come up and help us settle our problems...they are always there for us( family )...i really really feel better when i see him....he'll always give us very good solutions...to overcome our obstacles...but sometimes god dun lead our ways out...or even help us most of the times...we must help ourselves...but now...i'm really lost...really...dunno wat to do...i think...thats all for today...thats all....nights...
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